Undecided

And this time, some humor:

 A Day Off

So, you want to take a day off.  Let’s take a look at what you are asking for.  There are 365 days per year available for work.  There are 52 weeks per year in which you already have two days off per week, leaving 261 days available for work.  Since you spend 16 hours each day away from work, you have used up 170 days, leaving only 91 days available.  You spend 30 minutes each day on coffee break, that accounts for 23 days each year, leaving only 68 days a vailable.  With a one hour lunch period each day, you have used up another 48 days available for work.  You normally spend 2 days per year on sick leave, this leaves you only 20 days available for work.  We are off for 5 holidays per year, so you’re available working time is down to 15 days.  We generously give you 14 days vacation per year which leaves only 1 day available for work and I’ll be damned if you’re going to take that day off!!!

Obviously the math leaves something to be desired, but it’s funny nonetheless.

There are five levels of drinking:

Level 1, You get up to leave and your friend buys the next round of beers, and you think to yourself, “if I get 7 hours sleep, I’ll be ok.”

Level 2, You’re arguing against Astroturf, and when you get up to go, the little devil on your shoulder says, “you’re out with your friends, as long as you get 5 hours sleep, you’ll be cool.”

Level 3, You’ve progressed to tequila, you’re arguing for Astroturf, the little devil is the bartender and you’re thinking to yourself, “our waitress is the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met.”

Level 4, You’re last drink was rum and coke, you’ve finally decided to leave after getting thrown out, and your friend says, “I know this after-hours bar.”

Level 5, You finally crawl out into the sunlight and you say to yourself — come on, everyone say it with me — “I will never do this ever again, I swear… and this time I mean it.”